Familia

what happened to the word family? family use to be love and love use to mean something! aunts, uncles, grand parents, parents, sisters and brothers... it doesn't mean s anymore! everybody is hurting, everyone gets miss treated. so what does one do? turn on the rest of the family and hurt all the wrong people. even the people that have gone through all the trash with you and you turn your back on them and alienate them and for what? cause your pains are worse then the other persons? i know my family bugs me sometimes, but i love them and there isn't a single thing i wouldn't do for them. i also wouldn't stop talking to them or make it such a burden to get together with them for lunch or something... i have been through things i wouldn't wish on anyone. you don't see me treating people like trash! or disowning my family! i just don't get it.... there is always going to be someone that has had it worse.. i have had it pretty bad, but there is someone that had it worse than me... so what are you gonna feel sorry for yourself or become an alcoholic? drug addict? or be that guy that beats there wife or cheats on her? how about growing the f@*% up! but it is hard to stand by and say nothing.. so what do i do? stand by with a smile? ignore it? or go off on them? it would do no good. so honestly it turns me off on caring or wanting to be around.. and that is truly sad! and it breaks my heart! it really makes me want to cry, and gives me anxiety... i don't know what to do... give up? not my style.. cry? it would accomplish nothing! beat the shit out of someone or something? not worth it.. kill myself? that would be pathetic and selfish and quite honestly low of me to do!!! so i guess this is left at a stalemate and things remain unsaid... God? save us from ourselves... before it's too late!